Category Archives: Communication

Looking for a Quick Fix

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Observations of Human Nature

There is a process of discipline required for spiritual warfare and spiritual transformation as described in Ephesians 6:10-20, 2 Corinthians 10:3-6, 2 Corinthians 3:18 and many other scriptures.

Our human nature is impatient with a slow process. We crave instant easy solutions. What if a touch of power from an anointed man will fix all my problems! A little prick will keep my child healthy. A prayer, a touch, and everything can be changed in a moment!

We don’t want to acknowledge our own weakness and contribution to our current circumstance. We don’t want to spend time developing spiritual muscles through prayer, reading and memorizing God’s word. We don’t want to take total responsibility for our health and our lifestyle choices.

We want an easy route. We want a relatively pain-free option. Instant healing.

Discipleship takes time. Maturity takes time. Resorting health is not instant. A daily connection with our holy God through His word – which is accessed and illuminated only through faith in our Lord Jesus Christ will lead us to truth, abundant life, and blessing on our family.

The original disciples spent three years in the daily presence of Jesus, yet they still lacked understanding. How can we expect a faster route? Jesus told the man he had instantly healed – stop sinning. Our problem is our sin. Our tendency to go our own way, respond to our natural urges, seek quick easy answers, and put ourselves first, rather than reflect on the character of God and seek His refinement of our heart.

Our human nature makes us vulnerable to those who offer easy answers. We succumb to a sales pitch for vaccines, statin drugs, knee replacements, psych drugs, etc. These seem to offer a simple solution and are easier than discipline, exercise, healthy food, and positive life-style choices. Natural birth, breastfeeding, and responsive parenting rather than day care or a nanny, seem too difficult. Cultivating listening to the Spirit of God seems like an unattainable goal.

We crave power. We want to see power and victory in our life. The power we need is the power over sin. Jesus promised the Holy Spirit would give us power to be witnesses to the Gospel of Jesus Christ. This power must first be exercised on our own hearts.

Leaders must be careful not to bend to the desires of the people. People want a touch and a quick solution. Leaders feel pressured to provide it.

Colossians 2:23 makes it clear that true maturity does not come through following a lot of rules. “Such regulations indeed have an appearance of wisdom, with their self-imposed worship, their false humility and their harsh treatment of the body, but they lack any value in restraining sensual indulgence.” The root of our dilemma is sensual indulgence. How do we overcome that? The very next two verses are key, Colossians 3:1-2 “Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set you minds on things above, not on early things. For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God.”

Our challenge as leaders (and as parents) is to guide those we are responsible for into an understanding of how to overcome and restrain from sensual indulgence; fleshly indulgence, satisfying the flesh. We have to grow to maturity ourselves, and lead others to maturity by modeling the behavior.

“Therefore with minds that are alert and fully sober set your hope on the grace to be brought to you when Jesus Christ is revealed. As obedient children, do not conform to the evil desires you had when you lived in ignorance. But just as He who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do. As it is written, ‘Be holy for I am holy.’” 2 Peter 1:13-16.

“We put no stumbling block (obstacle) in anyone’s way so that our ministry will not be discredited. Rather, as servants of God we commend ourselves in every way…in purity, knowledge, patience, kindness; in the Holy Spirit and in sincere love; in truthful speech and in the power of God; with weapons of righteousness in the right hand and in the left;” 2 Corinthians 6:3-7.

The entire chapter of 2 Corinthians 6 is extremely instructive. God grants righteousness. This is described in Ephesians 6. The breastplate of righteousness is one of the weapons we require for spiritual warfare. Righteousness is produced over time as we allow the Holy Spirit to guide and control our thoughts and actions.

We need to encourage those we lead that they are God’s temple. God wants to do His work in them. God is able to nourish and protect His temple. They need to honor and protect the temple God has provided for them, not to poison it and expect a good outcome.

Looking for an easy quick solution usually backfires.

Becky Hastings collects information on health and tries her best to discover and share truth. By God’s grace, through Jesus Christ, I was saved, blessed with a husband of over 40 years, and five precious babies all grown up. I now get to delight as ten grandchildren grow! Together we can help each other discover a healthy path in this crazy upside down world.

A Beacon of Hope for Parents!

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https://www.unvaccinatedchildren.com/

I remember following Larry Cook before the big censorship hit social media. I was thrilled to find his website this morning. He’s done an extremely valuable service for humanity by taking all his experience and information and putting it together in one place (unvaccinatedchildren.com) to help parents make wise informed decisions. He advocates for vaccine awareness and encourages parents raising vaccine free children who count on their natural ‘immune system’ to protect them from illness. I can’t endorse every word he says, but I highly recommend the resources he has painstakingly put together. Over decades of activism, he has learned the reality of vaccine risk through his interactions with thousands of parents of injured children and wants to help parents not only AVOID the trauma of vaccine injury – but experience the joy of raising vibrant healthy vaccine free children.

On his website you will find a FREE course for parents: How to Raise Healthy Vaccine Free Children. This course covers the WHY and the HOW. Most of us have been exposed to so much “mis-information” throughout our lives (aka propaganda) that we may experience terror in our heart at the thought of depriving our child of the magical injections so strongly promoted in our society. It can be really hard to swim upstream especially when these shots are pushed so hard by those we call experts. This course will give parents confidence to raise thriving healthy vaccine free children – living to their maximum potential.

https://www.unvaccinatedchildren.com/courses/how-to-raise-healthy-vaccine-free-children/

Here are some of the topics covered:

Mr Cook also has GREAT ideas for how to be a better communicator of vaccine truth to those you love! His title: How to Convince a Loved One NOT to Vaccinate:

https://www.unvaccinatedchildren.com/heres-how-to-convince-a-loved-one-to-not-vaccinate/

He provides a different but valuable approach to a blog I wrote a few years ago entitled, Seven Essentials for Sharing Vaccine Truth With Loved ones.

Over the years I, like Larry, have met many families who have conducted their own case study with some children receiving vaccines, and others receiving less, and some of their children completely vaccine free. Without exception, every parent conducting this ‘at home experiment’ says categorically that their vaccine free child/ren are far healthier than those who received all or some of the recommended vaccines. The proof is right in front of their eyes.

Larry Cook shares a profound insight into why giving babies so many vaccines has NOT provided protection, and could be one of the most significant causes of allergies and auto-immune ailments occurring on a massive scale today:

Vaccines Do Not Work
Aggressively overstimulating the immune system with adjuvants in order to force a TH2 immune response (while ignoring the important TH1 immune response) to create antibodies to injected antigens does NOT create immunity – it simply creates an allergic reaction.

https://www.unvaccinatedchildren.com/

I had a lovely telephone conversation yesterday with one of my readers who lives in another country. I’m not sure how she found my blog – I’ve experienced a massive decrease in number of views since powerful forces decided all counter-narrative information was dangerous. She is a fellow activist who has investigated the topic of vaccines and is making informed choices for the health of her three children. She is seeking to educate others in her circles and struggles with the deep indoctrination so prevalent in most countries. People are raised to believe that these shots are necessary and helpful, that is “safe and effective”. I believe we are making progress. Events of the last few years have been an “unveiling” of truth. So many more people today are willing to ask questions and not blindly trust government authorities. Now is the time to figure out how to approach this critically important topic in your circles!

Previous blog about unvaccinated children.

Becky Hastings collects information on health and tries her best to discover and share truth. By God’s grace, through Jesus Christ, I was saved, blessed with a husband of over 40 years, and five precious babies all grown up. I now get to delight as ten grandchildren grow! Together we can help each other discover a healthy path in this crazy upside down world.

Paradigm shifts

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The desire to be right is the thirst for truth.

The desire to HAVE BEEN right is pride. 

Our PRIDE can easily stand in the way of seeing where we have been wrong; where we might have believed lies.

What the human being is best at doing is interpreting all new information so that the prior conclusions remain in tact. Warren Buffet

These ideas were inspired from a talk given by Amandha Vollmer as part of The End of Covid, a 90 part lecture series covering a wide range of topics. Her talk on Paradigm Shifts resonated and got me thinking. We can always benefit by reflecting on these concepts and asking ourselves probing questions.

We prefer cognitive short cuts. We don’t want to do the hard work.

A simple example, we read the product ingredients and compare products and conclude which is best so that next time we just reach for what we know. Or we trust the front label that says “all natural” and buy it without bothering to check the ingredient list. Or, we assume that if it is sold in the grocery store, it must have been approved and checked by someone.

We give special weight to information that allows us to come to the conclusion we want to reach.

It’s very uncomfortable to think about things we hold dearly. I know of people who have decided there is no hell because they have lost loved ones that were not in a good relationship with God. When we are faced with a challenge to our idea about something, we should ask ourselves, is there a reason I WANT this to be true?

Many highly educated people have such confidence and pride in their own education process – especially those with advanced degrees – that they automatically and unquestioningly accept conclusions by academics in other fields. They assume that the most highly educated and outspoken in a particular field must be right. They’ve been trained to respect the academic process. To challenge the legitimacy of an ‘expert’ in a different field challenges their own level of what they think they know in their own field. They automatically assume the person bringing the challenging idea “has no idea what they are talking about” because they are not ”trained in that field”. This is a logic fallacy. Ideas should be judged on evidence, not upheld because of appeals to authority or “the way it’s always been”. The more strongly held ideas in society are probably the ones that should be examined the most, but are often the hardest to be objective about – for instance, the shape of the earth and the origin of everything.

Studies are manipulated to prove what sponsors want to prove in order to achieve future grant money.

There are two outspoken [former] editors of scientific journals that both reach similar conclusions: up to 50% of all data and results published in ‘science’ can’t be trusted. But they are ‘Peer Reviewed’ everyone shouts. These editors describe how the peer review process has been corrupted. This leaves the average person struggling to know who or what to believe, especially in the area of what drug or procedure will actually bring benefits. There are so many voices, so much conflicting and competing information, what can I trust? Do I trust my dear sweet doctor who receives regular visits from Pharma reps, reads the medical journals, is trained in all the latest wonder meds, and abides by the “standard of Care” practices of their medical system? Do I trust those selling natural products and supplements? 

Of special consideration for Christians…

There are evil people that want to deceive us. The enemy comes to steal, kill and destroy. 

But, God is greater and stronger and delights to give wisdom to His children.

[His servants] will see His face, and His name will be on their foreheads. There will be no more night. They will not need the light of a lamp or the light of the sun, for the Lord God will give them light. And they will reign for ever and ever.

“Blessed are those who wash their robes, that they may have the right to the tree of life and may go through the gates into the city.Outside are the dogs, those who practice magic arts, the sexually immoral, the murderers, the idolaters and everyone who loves and practices falsehood. Revelation 22:4-5; 14-15

The question is not “Do I love lies?” The real question is “HOW have I loved lies?” “Where in my life do I cling to lies?” “Can I fully seek and accept TRUTH?” “How can I draw closer to God, seek fully His wisdom and guidance, so that I am protected from lies?”

I just read this morning a wonderful promise from Jesus:

“But when He, the Spirit of truth, comes, He will guide you into all the truth.” John 16:13

Becky Hastings collects information on health and tries her best to discover and share truth. By God’s grace, through Jesus Christ, I was saved, blessed with a husband of over 40 years, and five precious babies all grown up. I now get to delight as ten grandchildren grow! Together we can help each other discover a healthy path in this crazy upside down world.

Uganda Mission Trip

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My first trip to Uganda was in 2014 when I accompanied my husband on a visit to Dominion Church in Kampala. My husband has returned many times to Uganda to minister to pastors and leaders.

In May 2023 I had the privilege of returning with him to Uganda and I was invited to speak to the women at Dominion Church’s annual Bible Faith Conference and at the annual Woman Believer Conference hosted by the Pearl Haven Christian Center in Mbale a town about 225 km or 5 hours drive away. Fully describing our experience in Uganda is impossible, but I wanted a place to store the four talks I gave to the women. I was thrilled to be able to minister God’s word to an eager audience and was blessed to witness life in Uganda and the faithful followers of Jesus persevering despite difficulties beyond our comprehension.

The ladies were a very encouraging and accepting audience and I praise God for the opportunity I had to share the Word of God. All the talks were translated into the local Luganda language so they take a bit longer to listen. You may want to change the replay speed to 1.25 or 1.5! I also must mention that the weather in Uganda was very hot and humid for us! The temperatures throughout the year are pretty stable and every day had a low of 19 and a high of 29 C (that’s 66-84 F). Because of the humidity, by the end of the talks most speakers are dripping with sweat!

Dominion Church Bible Faith Conference, Kampala, Uganda

Theme: ”For out of His fullness we have all received grace upon grace.” John 1:16

Day One Workshop for Women: Overcoming Challenges 

Day Two Workshop for Women:  Raising Godly Children

Pearl Haven Christian Center, Mbale, Uganda, The Woman Believer Conference

Theme: The Strength of Faith Hebrews 11:11

Day One: Seeking the Blessing of God 

In this talk I include a short testimony of my journey to salvation through Jesus Christ. At the close of this talk I give an imperfect recitation of 2 Corinthians 4, a passage that has brought great encouragement to me. It was a thrill to be able to share God’s word and I pray it powerfully impacts people to have a hunger for God’s word and an understanding that it is possible to memorize it and hold it in our hearts.

Day Two: The Protection of Faith

At the close of this talk I give a recitation of 1 Peter 1 and explain how this passage brought me comfort and encouragement during 2020 and beyond as we witnessed an unprecedented world wide reaction which filled many with fear.

Becky Hastings collects information on health and tries her best to discover and share truth. By God’s grace, through Jesus Christ, I was saved, blessed with a husband of over 40 years, and five precious babies all grown up. I now get to delight as ten grandchildren grow! Together we can help each other discover a healthy path in this crazy upside down world.

A Seldom Spoken Perspective

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Calvin Robinson, an outspoken Anglican deacon from UK, presents some extremely articulate TRUTH in answer to the woke culture. I took some notes while listening to a speech he gave.

Many members of society – perhaps the large majority, share the views of Calvin but may straggle to express these ideas as clearly and don’t always convey the compassion we feel.

A man is a man.

A woman is a woman.

You cannot change your sex, it’s in the entirety of your DNA, in all of your chromosomes; It’s in your emotional state; your mental state; it’s who you are.

The idea that someone can be in the wrong body is a misnomer. You are your body.

God made man and woman in His image.

Are there people who feel gender dysphoria? Yes. Should entire cultures bend to their feelings? No.

We can have tolerance without affirmation. They can live in whatever reality they choose, but they cannot expect others to join their reality nor allow them to push their reality on others.

When we wholeheartedly accept a false reality, we participate in grooming children towards sexual perversions.

An entire industry has mushroomed offering hormones, multiple surgeries, and medical care that will be required for life. People are profiting from the mutilation of children’s bodies. 

This assault on children is a monstrous, demonic, wickedness. We do not condone chid grooming towards perversion, debauchery and degeneracy.

Compassion for people does not mean affirming their mental challenges, especially in schools.

No boundaries – If you accept that people ‘identify’ as anything other than what God made them, the boundaries are endless. They can identify as other genders, as a child, when an adult. Allowing such people in schools to influence children is extremely dangerous for children.

Adults are the ones who must draw the line. Children are immature, have great imagination, and are naturally explorative. They need adults who can point them to reality. The loving thing to do for children is to protect them from assault – whether of body or mind, and point them to the truth. Children are especially loved by God. Jesus clearly stated a dire warning to anyone who would participate in the harm of children: “It would be better for them to be thrown into the sea with a millstone tied round their neck than to cause one of these little ones to stumble.” Luke 17:2

These are hard truths to express. Anyone seeking to follow Jesus has great compassion for those who have been tricked into harming themselves. We cannot truly love if we passively stand by and don’t share insight into this carnage.

What can we do? As followers of Jesus we can be ardently PRO FAMILY. Pro Biblical marriage. Support families raising children. Encourage the younger generations to have children and raise them to fear and honor God. Support and help families that are homeschooling. In everything seek to live for the glory of God and not in fear. “The god of this world has blinded the minds of unbelievers, to keep them from seeing the light of the gospel of the glory of Christ, who is the image of God.” 2 Corinthians 4:4 We don’t hate the blind. We stand against the enemy, his servants, their works and the effects.

Becky Hastings collects information on health and tries her best to discover and share truth. By God’s grace, through Jesus Christ, I was saved, blessed with a husband of over 40 years, and five precious babies all grown up. I now get to delight as ten grandchildren grow! Together we can help each other discover a healthy path in this crazy upside down world.

Facts or Fiction?

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What do stats show about facts? Analysis of VAERS data by experienced statisticians shows some alarming patterns. What can we be sure of?

“Countries that have authorized experimental injections for the alleged treatment or prevention of the alleged bundle of symptoms called “Covid-19” have given immunity to Big Pharma. That means, no prosecution or damages for harm caused.

In that environment, it has been discovered that Big Pharma has been conducting “lethal dose” “trials” on human beings by hiding “toxic” and “super toxic” experimental drugs of all kinds in among the lots of “Covid” injections with intent to kill, and gather data on the killings.

Big Pharma has labeled these hidden batches with code numbers so they can track the expected deaths to the batches, so they will know which experimental drug at what dosage has done the killing.”

A discussion of these facts and the implications with German lawyer Reiner Fuellmich and Dr Sam White from the UK can be found here. More videos on this topic can be found here or here.

I have friends (in multiple countries) who are thoroughly persuaded that everything that has been presented to them through the media and government sources is true. They also state that accepting the vaccine is a good idea for their personal health, protection, and freedom to participate in society. They stress that getting the jab is the virtuous, caring responsibility of all people and imply – directly or indirectly – that those who are not willing to participate are being selfish.

They do not want more information and seem impervious to questions that do not endorse or support their way of thinking. I wanted to put this information together in a post for those who are interested in understanding some of the statistics that you will not find in the mainstream. If you want to take a deeper dive into the statistics involved in the vaccine discussion, this 2+ hour video interview with Dr Mike Yeadon, former scientific researcher with Pfizer, will be enlightening:

https://odysee.com/@Corona-Investigative-Committee:5/Mike-Session-86-en:0?r=GdBbFkXbDMKAWMf3LNz48DKqxthjGHE8

The group of statisticians investigating the VAERS data has released a website where you can get specific toxicity information on the individual vaccine lots. Doctors and pharmacists should be asked to check out the toxicity all lots of the vaccines they are providing. How Bad is My Batch?

From https://www.howbad.info/children.html

While it is true that the concept of vaccines is never mentioned in the Bible, the Bible gives us a foundation to understand what we are facing today. We have an enemy. His aim is to steal (life and happiness), kill (our bodies and spirits), and destroy (individuals, families, society) by any and all means (John 10:9). He is an expert liar (John 8:44). But he, and his minions, are not able to directly inflict harm on us. As children of God we have protection from God. But the enemy is able to trick God’s children into their own demise. He promises life and freedom. The enemy never delivers on his promises. The enemy uses fear to push us towards his agenda.

We do not need to cower in fear of the enemy. He is not powerful. He uses tricks to get us to agree to his plans. But, His tactics are repeated, making them obvious when you know what to look for. He told Eve that God was holding out on her and that there was much more to be gained by accepting his offer and eating the forbidden fruit. Adam stood silently by, watching his woman accepting the trick. Read, or re-read, Genesis 1 – 3 to understand the foundation of the devil’s tactics with mankind from the beginning.

Christians need to be aware of the evil. How often have we stood idly by in order not to face harassment in this PC dominated culture? But evil has propagated. Evil has always been attempting to lead the population into fear and destruction. These Time Magazine covers chronicle the recent attempts to generate such fear.

These modern day attempts to inflict a virus on the population at large did not gain the traction that we see worldwide from 2020. There are probably many reasons for this. Social media has played a role. Indebtedness on an individual and country level plays a role. People with power to protect, careers to protect, etc. will go along in order not to experience personal sacrifice. Pride, greed, and systemic corruption all play roles in the ability of the enemy to propagate lies to so many innocent, trusting people throughout the world.

Asking questions is vital. Critical thinking is seeking to believe more true things and believe less false things. We need to be able to understand contradictory information and discern truth. I believe Jesus Christ when He said “I am the way, the truth, and the life.” He healed many blind people. Even His disciples who spent so much time with Him, didn’t fully understand the meaning of all of His teaching. They were not able to grasp it. As ‘modern’ Christians our pride can cause us to think we know everything. We need to humbly ask God to open our eyes. May we say with the blind begger, “Lord, I want to see.” (Luke 18:41)

We also desperately need the Holy Spirit to lead and guide every thought and every decision we make. Jesus promised that the Holy Spirit would be given to those who accept and follow Him. I search the ancient Scriptures to learn more of the role of the Holy Spirit in our lives. John 14 and 1 John are good places to start.

I don’t have all the answers, but I do know that God wants His people to stand against evil. “Have nothing to do with the godless deeds of darkness, rather expose them.” (see more from Ephesians 5 in the turquoise box).

Here is a pastor who faced a tyrant in Zimbabwe who has insight into how Christians can discern and respond to tyrants.

  • “Once tyranny reveals itself, you know you are on a trajectory that will only intensify.”
  • Why it is important to recognize where we are at and what these indicators are pointing to.
  • “The way to fight against darkness and evil is with truth and light.”
  • We are all responsible before God to pursue truth and righteous.

There are many places in Scripture where evil was rampant in the culture and society. Some instances I’ve read recently include Josiah, as king of Judah (2 Kings 23); Daniel, inscripted into the enemy advisory force from a young age; and Nehemiah, serving a foreign king and learning of the heartache and suffering of his people in Jerusalem. These leaders had a surprising response. They all prayed with personal repentance and confession of sin. They claimed a shared responsibility for the evil that had taken hold in their lifetimes. They then sought to hear and obey God’s direction in their life. They played important roles in leading people to seek and honor God.

We desperately need revival. We need to be part of God’s work on the earth at this time. He is still building His kingdom and inviting people to receive forgiveness of sins and life through Jesus’ death and resurrection.

Repentance is the starting point.

We can proclaim this truth to a lost hurting world. More people are seeking truth than ever before. I pray you will be given power, just as promised by Jesus in Acts 1, to be God’s faithful witness to every person God brings across your path. God will open ears, minds, and hearts. We are privileged to proclaim the truth of His love and goodness.

To open their eyes, so that they may turn from darkness to light and from the power of Satan to God, that they may receive forgiveness of sins and a place among those who are sanctified by faith in me. Acts 26:18

Becky Hastings collects information on health and tries her best to discover and share truth. By God’s grace, through Jesus Christ, I was saved from the life of a rebel. I’ve been blessed with a husband of 41 years, and five precious babies all grown up. I now get to delight as nine grandchildren grow! Together we can help each other discover a healthy path in this crazy upside down world. Please subscribe (below) so you don’t miss any future blogs!

This Corrupt Generation?

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In one of his very first messages delivered to a public audience not long after Jesus’ death, resurrection, appearance, and return to heaven, Peter proclaims this timeless warning: “Save yourself from this corrupt generation.” Acts 2:40

Peter’s words, recorded 2000 years ago, ring very true today.

Sinners sin. Power corrupts. Leaders and governments control through any means possible. Why are we surprised?

Because we’ve been presented with a veneer that our country, our government, our leaders, our health care system, even the UN and WHO, have only good intentions for ‘we the people’. 

A facade. We believed lies. We were deeply deceived. Programmed from birth through many sophisticated methods available: entertainment, media, news, education, medical standards, ‘science’, etc. 

God is not surprised by current circumstances. His Word has timeless answers and will lead to wisdom and discernment – exactly what we need to navigate our current culture. 

“Repent and be baptized, every one of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. And you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit. The promise is for you and your children and for all who are far off—for all whom the Lord our God will call.” 

With many other words he warned them; and he pleaded with them, “Save yourselves from this corrupt generation.” Those who accepted his message were baptized, and about three thousand were added to their number that day. Acts 2:38-41

Read the whole chapter – Acts 2. I read God’s word every day, and these days the ancient writings seem more applicable than ever! As you seek God, He will answer. He promises that ALL who seek Him will find Him.

I don’t have all the answers. While there are many helpful theories about history, world operations, the route to health, I don’t believe any person alive understands all the background information needed to provide a comprehensive explanation. Any person who ignores God, His Creative work from the beginning of time, and His current explanation for world events, will miss out on huge portions of truth – even though they are sincerely seeking truth. Seeking God will lead to finding truth. I keep seeking. May I never hold on so tightly to my opinions that I miss seeing what God wants to show me. I have been deceived. We are all currently deceived about something. Jesus warns in Matthew 7, “Beware of false prophets. They come to you in sheep’s clothing, but inside are ferocious wolves. By their fruit you will know them.”

If you are ready for a challenge, I have found an incredibly helpful method of exploring the collection of ancient documents joined together in the book we know as the Bible.

Becky Hastings, avid follower of Jesus Christ, wife, mother, grandmother, health seeker and reporter. Seeking truth can be challenging, and sometimes confusing, but far more rewarding than staying ignorant.

Overcoming Bias

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What are my biases?

Do I express strong bias that could cause polarization of those who do not agree with me?

How to detect your expression of bias:

Words. Our own language can provide a flashlight into the recesses of our own motivations.

  1. Absolute Language. The words you use are clues that you are expressing a bias that will not be well received by those who do not share your bias. Absolute language such as “any”, “all”, “always” may appeal to those who share your bias – it’s sort of like ‘preaching to the choir’. Using strong words may win you praise from fans but will most likely alienate those you might be hoping to sway towards your way of thinking.
  2. Framing inferences as facts. This can include inferring the motivation of others, or making inferences based on the lack of actions of others. 
  3. Framing your own motivation positively. E.g. I seek solely to find “objective truth.”
  4. Broadening conclusions. For instance, painting someone as a ‘dictatorial ideologue relentlessly oppressing humble and honest scientists in order to ensure the only messages that survive are self-serving propaganda’ is usually a stretch.

Questions to help me examine my bias:

  1. How might my own beliefs be coloring my advocacy? If I use absolute language and state inferences as facts I could be reducing my effectiveness in sharing what I believe to be true.
  2. Do I feel insulted or offended when others do not share my views or challenge my points?
  3. Are there times when I overstate my data?
  4. Do I sometimes approach a conversation with a predetermined opinion, then back into arguments that support it? Even a little?
  5. Can I read the science from the opposing position? Do I rate the quality of research higher because of feelings about a particular author or conclusion? Is there a body of science I feel loyalty or affection for?

Other clues that highlight your bias:

  • Do you dismiss scientific papers that don’t agree with your beliefs?
  • Can you impartially evaluate the quality of the research in a paper?
  • Can you listen without interrupting when someone expresses an opposing point of view?
  • Do you maintain objectivity in your decision making process?
  • The most pernicious kind of subjectivity comes from those who think they are objective.
  • Can we move beyond self-righteousness in our ideology?

I find that if I have crafted a story in my mind that makes me the righteous victim and others the premeditated villains, I am likely to have little influence with them, or to their adherents. To the degree you can come to see the failings of others as temptations you also occasionally succumb to, you’ll humanize the opposition and amplify your prospects of healthy conversation.

One of the best ways to resolve conflict is to transcend it. If this is an issue that is extremely important to you, or important for someone you love, try to step off of your high horse and seek to have a mutually respectful conversation. Here are some ideas I’ve gleaned from communication specialists:

  1. Find a time when you are not debating a specific topic or specific paper. 
  2. Open the conversation by acknowledging frequent conflict about topics in the past. Acknowledge any transgressions in your own approach to those conflicts.

You might say, for example, “I experience our decision making conversations as more contentious than is helpful. I know I’ve contributed to that. There are times when I let my ego trump my objectivity. I feel insulted and defensive, and that’s my stuff. And I suspect I’m not the only one. I suggest we step away from the specifics for a few minutes and discuss our purpose and our mutually shared goals. Let’s find principles that we both agree on such as the robust health of our children. My hope is that if we can all commit to those principles and stay to our convictions, we will reduce unnecessary conflict.”

It could well be that in the conversation you discover an unapologetic commitment of the other person to support only a particular bias. If so, you have a decision to make.

If, on the other hand, the conversation leads to purposeful and meaningful conversation with a discovery of shared purpose and principles that will guide the interactions, you will then have a context within which to challenge decisions that don’t fit with your mutually shared principles and hopefully come to a resolution.

I acknowledge great insight gleaned from https://www.vitalsmarts.com/crucialskills/2020/02/unconscious-bias-in-science/#comment-13183

Previously I wrote some ideas on having discussions with those you love on hard topics that has reached 2,400 people.

Becky Hastings, wife, mother, grandmother, passionate follower of Jesus and truth. As a breastfeeding counselor for over 23 years Becky is devoted to helping parents make wise decisions for the long-term health and wellbeing of their babies. As a member of a Vaccine Safety Education Coalition, Becky writes and speaks on the topic of vaccine safety.

Parenting 101: Raising Little Sinners

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watching-the-sun-set-croppedIs there an approach to parenting that is 100% guaranteed to help me raise the type of children I desire? Is there a magic method of getting my children to respect my words and comply with my instructions as a parent?

Grandparenting must be one of the most wonderful roles a person could ever have in life. I LOVE spending time with my grandchildren, every one of them is delightful in a unique way, and they are teaching me so much!

After having my five and three year old grandchildren come for ‘four sleepovers with Granny and Grandpa’, without their parents, I have arrived at a clearer understanding of the word sin and the primary struggle of parenting. Of course I experienced these issues many times in raising my five children, but this fresh immersion into parenting brought some vivid reminders.

Sin is an uncomfortable word for most of us. We don’t easily see ourselves as sinners. The word ‘sinner’ sounds like an extremely heinous description of ‘bad’ people. Sin is actually a lot simpler and a lot subtler; the essence of sin is simply wanting our own way. We are born with a desire to get what we want and to pursue our own desires, with little thought for the needs of others. As we grow older, most of us get trained to some degree or another that we need to also respect other people in our lives, but that does not come naturally.

What does God say about sin? Sin is the thing that separates us from God. Sin prevents us from the loving connection He wants most to have with us. Sin is ignoring God’s sovereignty over us, as our Designer and Creator, and saying, “I have a better plan.” Sin is thinking God’s desires for me will limit me, but I will find happiness through pursuing the things I think will bring satisfaction.

Why is parenting so difficult? Because we are raising little sinners. Little independent people who have their own ideas about what will bring them satisfaction. Some of these little people seem to have a personality that wants to buck every single event or decision throughout the course of a day. Others may be mostly agreeable, but every once in awhile their independence will exert itself. Why can’t children just be agreeable? Why don’t they understand that we only want what is best for them, that we have years of experience that has given us insight, understanding, and wisdom for every decision we make? Why don’t they just eat the healthy food we provide? Why don’t they immediately respond when we have given them warnings and prepared them for the fact that a fun activity must now end? Why do they sometimes randomly physically attack their sibling?

Why do we feel like we are in a constant battle to see who is in charge in this relationship? Why can’t they just accept our authority?

Have I done something wrong? Am I a bad parent? Did I miss a window of “training” at a certain age?

Should I have spanked my children? Should I have spanked my children more? Should I have not spanked my children? Is there a formula for raising compliant “yes, ma’am” children that I missed? Did I read the wrong books? Did I follow the wrong advisors?

What is the answer? Is there actually an answer?

How did God ‘parent’ His people?

God’s kindness towards us leads us to repentance. Repentance is the goal. Repentance means getting off the train heading for “my way” and boarding the train heading to “God’s destination.” Every sermon given by the early followers of Jesus, which we read in the book of Acts, explains the necessity of repentance. As parents, or grandparents, our goal should be to gently help our children or grandchildren to understand what repentance looks like, and why it is desirable.

Having a “see I told you so” attitude, while very tempting, generally doesn’t lead a child toward repentance. Repentance involves a bending of our will towards God’s will. God never forces us. As parents we are often tempted to force our children to our will. This may seem to work for some children, yet this adage is true for adults and children, “a man convinced against his will is of the same opinion still.” Our goal in training children is not a compliant child. Our goal is a child with a heart that delights in God and obeying Him.

Some parenting techniques may result in a very well behaved young child. However, our goal should not focus entirely on the moment, but should also consider the long term. When I think in terms of raising a well adjusted thirty something adult, my interactions with my child may be significantly impacted. The methods of achieving my goal require a longer commitment. Sometimes having a long-term view can result in momentary embarrassment, especially in a public setting where there are people who may judge my child or me unsatisfactorily. My goal is not to please the public audience around me. My goal is not personal pride in a ‘well-behaved’ little child. My goal is raising a human being with a deep knowledge of His Creator, an understanding of their own propensity towards their own direction, and a humble submission to seeking God and His way.

Parenting with these goals is not an easy task. The other problem I face is that I am also a sinner. I naturally desire my own way. I easily fall prey to pride and judgment. It’s hard for me to see my sin or my pride. I am a sinner, raising little sinners. In my parenting journey I also need to repent. I need to get off my train toward my own perceived destination for my children, and myself and get on the train that takes me towards God’s outcome. How do I do this? Parenting requires a daily surrender and a daily seeking of wisdom from God, through His Word, and laying down my own ways. Parenting is trusting God in the way we desire our children would trust and respond to us. Parenting is modeling for our children what trusting God looks like.

Acknowledging that I will never be a perfect parent and my children will never be perfectly obedient takes a huge weight off of my shoulders. Trying to force perfection on our children or ourselves is a source of extreme stress.

Jesus wants so much more for us. He wants to refresh us with His presence. “Repent, then, and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped out, that times of refreshing may come from the Lord.” Acts 3:19

For Women Only

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Toblerone Triangle croppedQuarrelsome or Nagging Wife

It’s better to live alone in the desert
    than with a quarrelsome, complaining wife. Proverbs 21:19

Marriage is difficult. We’ve been working on it for 35+ years and I still have so much to learn! Reading this verse in Proverbs about the nagging wife, usually brings to mind incidents of OTHER women. Rarely have I thought I might BE that woman.

As I listened to the audio Bible of Proverbs 21 last week, I believe the Spirit of God gave me a fresh insight and deeper understanding of the nagging wife.

When we hear the words “nagging wife” or “quarrelsome wife” most of us women, have an idea of what that is. We may also know someone who fits that description. But,

What does a man perceive as quarrelsome/nagging?

In particular, what might your man perceive as nagging?

Having recently read most of the old book with old-fashioned ideas, Fascinating Womanhood by Helen Andelin, I came up with this list of possible things men might perceive as nagging.

Reminders of his shortcomings in any area of life. Maybe even something as simple as reminding him that he left the milk on the counter, or left the garage door open. Additionally, almost every man will feel nagged by any reminder, however subtle or unintentional, that reflects negatively on his current role of provider. For instance, reminding him that you are making great personal sacrifices because you have such a small budget, or reminding him of how little money you managed to spend, etc. While you may genuinely feel your efforts need to be commended, they may come across as reminders that he is not providing the family with the abundance he would like to.

A wife is often the one and only place a man will reveal his deepest thoughts/feelings/insecurities/vulnerabilities. We must guard these as a sacred treasure, not to be shared with others. Never to be spoken of in anything that may be interpreted to be demeaning or belittling. Anything that reminds him in a negative way of the vulnerability he has shared with you will most certainly be interpreted as nagging.

While we must guard the treasures shared with us by our husbands, we must not allow them to burden us. We must release those deep secrets into the care of our Lord Jesus who has only affection for us. We must not hold on and allow our husband’s insecurities to weigh us down. We must learn to answer with faith and encouragement both for the sake of our husband and for our own sake.

Another action that could be interpreted as ‘nagging’ by our husband is any attempt to share information or “teach”. Most efforts to bring information or expertise and share it, usually backfire. Generally a man does not desire to learn anything from his wife. If he does want to learn from you, he will certainly ask you, in which case you must share the skills you have gained in a humble patient way. Never patronize him, or speak down to him for not knowing something you know. Never bring him new information, as if you have something really important to teach him. When we bring new information to a man he interprets that as highlighting his weaknesses. What a man wants to hear from his wife is how awesome he is. He only wants to discuss things that directly relate to him and build him up. Everywhere he turns in the world he finds challenges, competition, complaints and criticism. From his wife he wants bolstering. He wants a viewpoint that sees him as the hero.

Other common things woman may inadvertently do that can be interpreted as nagging include talking to him as if he is one of the children, making any disparaging remark about his academic abilities, his financial abilities or past mistakes, any negative reference to his physical appearance or presentation, and unsolicited reminders of any sort. Even when we have good motivations, he doesn’t want to have his actions questioned, “You aren’t going to eat that are you?” or “You aren’t eating now are you?”

Encouraging is probably the polar opposite of nagging. Our goal should never be maintaining a neutral position, but to be robustly encouraging. Encouragement is not only conveyed through the words we say. Encouragement does not hinge on our intentions behind our words. The litmus test for encouragement is how your man hears and interprets your words and intentions. While every man has the same landscape of hopes, dreams, drives and insecurities (For Women Only, Revised and Updated Edition: What You Need to Know about the Inner Lives of Men by Shaunti Feldhahn), every man is different and a puzzle for his wife to navigate. Your unique and valuable position as a wife means learning what words and actions your husband finds encouraging.

Learning how to respond in an encouraging, non-nagging manner does not mean squashing all your thoughts and feelings inside. It does not mean disappearing into a non-person state. As a wife you have a unique position and opportunity to be the one light of encouragement in your man’s life. If you see yourself in this position of honor, you will reap benefits beyond your imagination.

Whole FamilyAuthor Becky Hastings, wife, mother, grandmother, writer, and speaker, is passionate about health, Jesus, and joy. Becky blogs at https://journeyboost.com and shares health information on her Facebook page. Please like journeyboost on Facebook!